the nerves are setting in.....

Most people don't know this about me, but I spend most of my conscious time here on earth being nervous! Yes NERVOUS....butterflies in my stomach...sweaty palms nervous...it can be about various things....my clients new haircut, having to meet someone new, results of my Dads monthly scans, even crazy stupid things like having to return a phone call to a neighbour I don't know that well, having a meeting at the bank...just nervous...and yep, you guessed it right now I am nervous!

The crazy thing about this is hardly anyone knows this about me, actually I think people see me as very confident, put together person.........HA...not so not so at all!!

So here is the deal....tomorrow at 11:30 D and I are headed to our first Mommy/Baby get together...and I am so nervous about it. It is so ridiculous!! I know most of the people that will be there...they are not people that I hang out with on a regular bases but I do know them...so we all have babies within 6 months of each other...some have older children as well....I don't know what it is that is making me so uptight...but boy I have to get this under control...it is really so nice of the hostess to include me, as I said earlier this is not a group that I hang out with often. It is really super nice of them to ask me to join them today...but I think that just makes the nervousness even worse.....

So clearly I can not cancel....but I am fretting about what I'm going to wear....I always have a tendency to be overdressed...and I want to blend so this is a problem...I'm freaking about what D should wear...cause I don't want her to be the kid with the MOM that now overdresses her...ughghg....and then what I have to take for lunch, a salad a dessert????.......and then the freaking fact that all of these women seem to know what they are doing with this parenting thing and I feel like I have NO clue...and then that just leads to....over analyzing...ladies this sadly is what I do best...I picture everything in my head, have it all laid out...only making my palms sweat more and the butterflies just unbearable....

I'm a big girl though and it is time to face the music....I am ready to go...outfits picked not to much but not to little...big autumn salad made...and big ole smile on my face...wish me luck!!

time to haul out the big bins...

OK so looks like Little Miss "D" isn't the only one gaining weight in this house....but I can tell you she is the only one getting any applause....ughghhg

Pre little Miss "D", I had lost those last 8 very aggravating pounds...actually due to the stress of 2011 I had got to that number that I had always thought of as my goal...(funny thing is murphy's law I still thought I was to heavy, I know women we will never ever be happy)...anyways I had got there....you know that moment when all the clothes in your closet fit...some are even big...those crazy items you buy and swear as you are tugging at them doing the knee bends in the dressing room that once you lose the last 5 pounds this will be perfect...well most of the time you never lose that 5 and never wear that item....well it was my time to haul out all of those ridiculous purchases....even though they may have pleats in the wrong places and they were wide leg not skinny I was wearing these bad boys........well not anymore ladies.....

In the past 4 months I have ate way to many carbs and have missed some much needed cardio...those 8 pounds plus some are back......and today was the day that it hit me.....reality! I don't know what I have been telling myself the past month, surely I am smart enough to know that the dryer doesn't shrink your jeans especially when you never dry them...for some reason today was the day that I looked at myself in the mirror and actually realized WOW...you need to get back at it girl...and right after that I had to do the climb of shame...I had to pull down the big bin....that's right folks the fat bin...the pants that I vowed would never wrap themselves around this body again....

You know it was always so funny when D and I would be out and about in the first couple months and people would say to me....WOW you just had a baby....haha I would sheepishly giggle and say..."oh yeah, I don't know what the big deal is"...very quickly following up "no no, Delaney is adopted....Oh they would say and carry on....well all my little sarcastic humour I'm afraid has caught up with me...cause those Moms have shed those last few baby pounds and now they can come right up to me and say...."gee hun, those last few baby pounds sure are hard to shed aren't they."

I wouldn't blame these ladies in the least...quite frankly I don't know how any of you lose the baby weight....all I seem to have time for is chips and wine at 10pm these days....ahhh now this might be where the problem lies.....lol

Hello Again....

I'm back! Seeing that I am just getting into the swing of things again I thought I might give everyone that is visiting me for the first time a little overview shall we say of who I am and what this ole blog is all about.....

So this is me...StylinMom....haha self-proclaimed obviously!!

I am a brand new Mom to the most gorgeous baby girl...little miss "D". My hubby "T" and I have been waiting(not so) patiently for 3 years for this little person to enter our lives. Now I have to say there have been some down-right nasty, ugly cry, mascara smearing times through-out this blog...the last 3 years have been really really tough....but this is how I know that Mr. T and I are the best of the best....we have overcome some pretty sad moments but still love each other to bits....muah...We were overjoyed on May 24th of this year when we got the "call" that "D" was ready to come home to us...and we have been in love ever since. So a lot of this blog is now dedicated to her, or shall we say me trying to figure her and this whole mommy thing out...as you will soon see I have no idea what I am doing....when you only get 3 days to prepare for a newborn to come to your house, you sadly don't get time to read what to "Expect when you are expecting"...or what the hell is going to happen to your so called life(is that in publication, cause it should be)....so this is me and my days loving little miss "D" and figuring it out as we go!!!

The other big part of my life is my Aveda Salon....or SALOON as I like to refer to it....yes the life and times of working in a hair-salon......I have been a hairstylist for 17 years......ha can not believe I am that old....(did I mention I started working when I was 15?!?!?).....so lots of my stories are about my clients and the absolutely obscene stuff they say to me....it is crazy....now I will never ever let you know who is telling me what, that is an unwritten rule in my salon...never ever repeat what they have told you......cause they tell us some pretty serious shit...wowza...so stayed tuned for some funny saloon gossip....

So that about wraps up what the heck my life and blog is about.....Just StylinMom juggling my 4 days in comfy pants and ball caps to my 3 days of uber fashionissta, make-up tip giving boss of 9 life.......geesh I'm tired just thinking about this!!!

I am so excited to meet new MOMS, adoptive MOMS and just ladies that are interested in life...welcome to BLOGGINSTYLE!

4 months!

It has been four months since little miss "D" joined our family. In some ways it has just flown by...life seems to be more and more like that as we get older...the days, weeks, months and years whiz by without you even realizing it. In other ways though it seems like she has been with us forever....it is almost hard to remember what life was like without her.

Sometimes I just sit and stare at her......hardly believing that she gets to stay...that she is ours to protect and love forever.

When I look at her, I don't see my nose or T's colouring...no, there will never be a time that we discuss that red in her hair...oh it must be from her great grandma...no I don't see any familiar traits from "T" or I....I do however see her birthmother's features coming through...those eyes, that colouring...

What I do see when I stare at her is this....that crinkle in her nose when she looks at "T"...that huge gummy grin she gives me when I walk in the door....those amazing morning smiles when one of us goes in to get her in the morning....when she wraps her arms around our necks when she is so so sleepy....when I stare at little "D"....I see our 4 month old daughter....and I feel so blessed.........

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I'm back...I think!

It has been so long, so long since I have written here...yes I have given little updates here and there, but I have not been committed to this blog for a very long time. Why...why now when I am busier than I have ever been juggling a new baby and work, why now would I decide that it is time to commit to this again....who knows...but I decided that I needed to start this again...get these ramblings, sometimes crazy thoughts down on "paper"...I don't want to miss a thing right now....

What can I say, since I left you things have been crazy....the extreme highs and lows of 2011 would make even the writers of your favorite late afternoon soap opera's head spin...sometimes all I can do is laugh...thinking to myself, this could not just have happened...

There are times when I wake up and I am sure it has all been a dream, or a nightmare...

So I will start with the highs....obviously our beautiful baby girl...little miss "D"...she is perfect! I can't even tell you how wonderful and complete life feels now that she is here...what I thought might make me manic...the fact that we had 3 days to prepare for her arrival...the fact that I had to work full-time for the first 6 weeks of her life...the fact that two very career oriented people suddenly found themselves with a little being counting on them for everything...despite all of these things....I LOVE my life...I am super proud of T and I...I am surprised how everything has just fallen into place...perfectly....with the help of some very amazing family and friends...this wonderful, surprise addition has been the most amazing gift EVER!!!

So obviously, this has been amazing........

Now the lows...they have been low...when I think about these events, this is when I think I am living in some sort of sick nightmare...but then I remember so many others are living this same nightmare...we are not alone......sadly we have alot of company...I think I won't even "damage" this post with all the lows....maybe someday.....for now I am just going to be grateful that I have got my bloggin groove back.....

I plan to "see" you all very soon........