It's 4am and I am wide awake!
Thinking!
Worrying!!
Surprise Surprise!
grrrrrrrrrr this really pisses me off!
and to top if off, I'm hungry...so what is going to happen next...I'm going to grab a snack which I don't need, and as I tear open the package of something sinfully junky, I'm going to wake little D which will wake Mr T....and then I am going to have to admit what I'm worried about. All bad bad bad!!
Ok on second thought to avoid the extra pounds and the screaming babe and the "chat" about the worry...I'm going to attempt to sneak back into bed...unnoticed, still hungry...and just worry in a horizontal position.
Wish me luck!
Friday, October 26, 2012
Sunday, October 21, 2012
My 39th Year!!!!
Tomorrow I turn 38!! How did this happen...my mind still feels like it is in its mid to late twenties...but when I look in the mirror I can see all 38 years, grey hair, tiny lines starting to form around my eyes...and when I look at twenty somethings now...oh my, I can see the difference. I think it is officially time for me to stop shopping at Forever 21!?!?
I have to say I have been so incredibly lucky. My years have been wonderful...exciting, happy times!
This is what I have learned in my 38 years!
1- there is nothing more rewarding than working hard and fulfilling a dream
2- watch what you say with passion, it will usually come back and bite you in the ass
3- friends will change, your family won't
4- learning a healthy way of living is more important then being a size 2
5- life is rough, wear a helmet!
6- always tell the truth, it truly will set you free
7- have faith...whatever you choose to believe in, believe in it with all your heart! Some day faith may be the only thing that you have to get you through!
8- having a positive attitude can save your life
9- be grateful for everyday...each one is a gift
10- the love you can have for your child is like no other
So here I am embarking on my 39th year! I think I will enjoy these next couple of days to the fullest...doing everything with complete heart and soul....grateful for all things in my life big and small....looking ahead with wonderful, excited anticipation!
m
xo
I have to say I have been so incredibly lucky. My years have been wonderful...exciting, happy times!
This is what I have learned in my 38 years!
1- there is nothing more rewarding than working hard and fulfilling a dream
2- watch what you say with passion, it will usually come back and bite you in the ass
3- friends will change, your family won't
4- learning a healthy way of living is more important then being a size 2
5- life is rough, wear a helmet!
6- always tell the truth, it truly will set you free
7- have faith...whatever you choose to believe in, believe in it with all your heart! Some day faith may be the only thing that you have to get you through!
8- having a positive attitude can save your life
9- be grateful for everyday...each one is a gift
10- the love you can have for your child is like no other
So here I am embarking on my 39th year! I think I will enjoy these next couple of days to the fullest...doing everything with complete heart and soul....grateful for all things in my life big and small....looking ahead with wonderful, excited anticipation!
m
xo
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
~curious: a question about our adoption~
Someone asked me a question the other day. The question I think is one that many people have, some might be to afraid to ask, but this woman asked and I'm glad she did. She had been thinking about this question for some time, she just wasn't sure what the answers would be and this worried her...she needed the answer, and I am so glad that she had the courage to ask me.
Her question came in 2 parts....first "Do you have any contact with D's birth mom?" The answer to this question is yes we do have some contact. The day that we brought D home I started a private blog that only myself, T, J(D's birth mom) and one of J's best friends can see. I post pictures from time to time and we comment away to each other every so often. The comments are light..."oh she is getting so big", "so cute" etc etc. Also every 5-6 months we have got into a pattern of emailing each other. J is a very sweet young woman, very kind and sincere. On Mothers Day and Father's Day she sent both T and I the sweetest emails, and as a matter of fact just this morning I awoke to an email from J. Just a touching base kind of email. Which I am so glad that we continue. I always want to have contact with J. We don't know what the future holds whether our relationship will become stronger, including visits or telephone conversations or maybe it will just stay as it is. But I want some contact with her always for little D's sake...if D has questions that I just can't answer I want to feel comfortable enough to contact J about them.
This brings me to the second part of this sweet woman's question. "Aren't you afraid that if you keep talking to her, that she will take her back?" I know that many people don't entirely understand adoption, and may think this...let me set things straight...this is NOT possible, D is our child in every sense of the way. Until D is 18 years old she is going to have to put up with us! Now that doesn't mean that we won't see J, or at least talk with her lots...D might even spend lots of time with her over the years....but never ever can J "take" her away...which by the way, she would never ever want to do.
It actually is so funny to me that people still think that birth parents can come back and take their children away from adoptive couples...yes maybe years ago, or in the movies...I don't know maybe at one point in time that did happen. It doesn't now....once the appropriate time has passed and court orders are signed this just can't happen.
It even becomes more comical to me, because I know and talk with many birth moms and here is the thing....they do not make their decisions lightly....it isn't like one day they wake up and say....geesh I think I might as well choose adoption....yeah that sounds good today we will do that!! These amazing women put so much thought and emotion and time into their decisions...at least the birth mothers that I have ever had contact with this is how it has been. J spent hours preparing herself emotionally for this adoption. She tirelessly researched how she would feel before, during and after....she did not make this decision lightly. I was always so impressed with her throughout the whole process and still to this day....Do I think that there are times J wishes she made a different decision...NO honestly I can say that as much as I know her I don't think that at all. I think she thinks about D everyday....probably some days more than once...I know I think about J everyday, so I would expect that she thinks about us. However I know that she made this decision with her heart overflowing with love for D...she knew this was what was right for her and D...we are just the amazing lucky, fortunate couple that she choose to get to raise this wonderful little girl!!
So to answer this woman's question, I politely told her the facts and also tried to ease her mind about J...J is probably the most mature young woman I have ever met...she gave us the most amazing gift...and for that I will be forever grateful. More then that though she is D's birth mother...D's blood, she is going to become a much more important part of our life as time goes on...I have always said there can never ever be too many people to love a child. We will welcome J into our family when and if she wants that...we are so thankful that we are all working at keeping the lines of communication open between us and take everyday as it comes.
Her question came in 2 parts....first "Do you have any contact with D's birth mom?" The answer to this question is yes we do have some contact. The day that we brought D home I started a private blog that only myself, T, J(D's birth mom) and one of J's best friends can see. I post pictures from time to time and we comment away to each other every so often. The comments are light..."oh she is getting so big", "so cute" etc etc. Also every 5-6 months we have got into a pattern of emailing each other. J is a very sweet young woman, very kind and sincere. On Mothers Day and Father's Day she sent both T and I the sweetest emails, and as a matter of fact just this morning I awoke to an email from J. Just a touching base kind of email. Which I am so glad that we continue. I always want to have contact with J. We don't know what the future holds whether our relationship will become stronger, including visits or telephone conversations or maybe it will just stay as it is. But I want some contact with her always for little D's sake...if D has questions that I just can't answer I want to feel comfortable enough to contact J about them.
This brings me to the second part of this sweet woman's question. "Aren't you afraid that if you keep talking to her, that she will take her back?" I know that many people don't entirely understand adoption, and may think this...let me set things straight...this is NOT possible, D is our child in every sense of the way. Until D is 18 years old she is going to have to put up with us! Now that doesn't mean that we won't see J, or at least talk with her lots...D might even spend lots of time with her over the years....but never ever can J "take" her away...which by the way, she would never ever want to do.
It actually is so funny to me that people still think that birth parents can come back and take their children away from adoptive couples...yes maybe years ago, or in the movies...I don't know maybe at one point in time that did happen. It doesn't now....once the appropriate time has passed and court orders are signed this just can't happen.
It even becomes more comical to me, because I know and talk with many birth moms and here is the thing....they do not make their decisions lightly....it isn't like one day they wake up and say....geesh I think I might as well choose adoption....yeah that sounds good today we will do that!! These amazing women put so much thought and emotion and time into their decisions...at least the birth mothers that I have ever had contact with this is how it has been. J spent hours preparing herself emotionally for this adoption. She tirelessly researched how she would feel before, during and after....she did not make this decision lightly. I was always so impressed with her throughout the whole process and still to this day....Do I think that there are times J wishes she made a different decision...NO honestly I can say that as much as I know her I don't think that at all. I think she thinks about D everyday....probably some days more than once...I know I think about J everyday, so I would expect that she thinks about us. However I know that she made this decision with her heart overflowing with love for D...she knew this was what was right for her and D...we are just the amazing lucky, fortunate couple that she choose to get to raise this wonderful little girl!!
So to answer this woman's question, I politely told her the facts and also tried to ease her mind about J...J is probably the most mature young woman I have ever met...she gave us the most amazing gift...and for that I will be forever grateful. More then that though she is D's birth mother...D's blood, she is going to become a much more important part of our life as time goes on...I have always said there can never ever be too many people to love a child. We will welcome J into our family when and if she wants that...we are so thankful that we are all working at keeping the lines of communication open between us and take everyday as it comes.
Sunday, October 14, 2012
I Worry!!
I WORRY!
I am worried!!
I am a worrier!!!
I am always worried about something...well I guess that is not true, for about 4 days 2 weeks ago I actually said to myself...M you don't have butterflies in your stomach...you are actually totally worryfree right now...ahhh it was the best....but short short lived!!!
So here it is the lowdown the list, the facts...have I told you I love lists...I am a worrier that loves lists...so why wouldn't I write a list of what I am worried about!! Makes perfect sense to me!!!
1- Right now for some reason I am very worried about explaining little D's birthstory to her....I am worried that she will be sad, I am worried we won't explain it right...won't explain it early enough....or we will start talking to soon....will she be angry, will she be distant, will she be ok...my stomach is in knots about it...I know she will have all of those emotions, and they are all ok and normal...I just want to do the right thing for her, so I worry!
2- We have weddings coming up in our family...and with weddings you have drama...I am worried about the drama...people are sad, people are happy, people are angry, people are frustrated and then there are people like me, trying to stay neutral...but I worry....I worry that both days will be the best days they can be for those beautiful blushing brides...how can I make this better for them...I worry!
3- I worry about my new business...was this the right time...will it be successful....will the amazing team I hired be satisfied and love us just as much as we love them...will this make the income I hope for, for my family...I worry!
4- We need our roof done at our cottage...I worry...(ok T I hope you read that one...call the roofing company already!!!!!!! lol)
5- Life changes once you have a baby...no one can prepare you for this...you can talk to a zillion people about it but you will have NO idea until it happens....it changes how you think, it changes your relationships...you are happy, but tired, stressed...it changes your marriage...am I taking enough time with T, do we need to have more dates, more chats...I worry!
6- I am going to be a bridesmaid in June....will the dresses be short....I worry!!! haha that is just a joke but secretly GAWD I hope I don't have to show these god awful knees...hehe
7- My Dad, my Mom...I worry!
8- Should I make sensory bins, is D watching too much TV...to much Barney not enough reading time...is my patience wearing thin too much...am I doing a good job as a Mom...oh man I worry!
9- I have bad teeth...once I had 8 cavaties in 1 visit....so you can imagine...am I flossing enough, brushing long enough...with the right brush...ughghhhg I worry!
10- am I eating too many carbs not enough freaking protein...seriously...come on....I worry!!!
11- and last but not least....should I really have bought that pair of skinny leathery jean things....like really these legs in those pants...hmmmmm.....I worry!!!
So as you can see I worry...about silly things sometimes and very serious things sometimes....but man this girl needs some sleep...I had to get some of these things off my chest! So thanks for listening....this mama is going to sleep pretty tonight...thanks to you and the red....( red wine that is....oh yeah one more...do I drink too much....probably...that is one thing I don't worry one bit about!!!)
**** my spell check won't work...so now on top of it all I am really worried that this post is full of typos....ughghhghggh :)
I am worried!!
I am a worrier!!!
I am always worried about something...well I guess that is not true, for about 4 days 2 weeks ago I actually said to myself...M you don't have butterflies in your stomach...you are actually totally worryfree right now...ahhh it was the best....but short short lived!!!
So here it is the lowdown the list, the facts...have I told you I love lists...I am a worrier that loves lists...so why wouldn't I write a list of what I am worried about!! Makes perfect sense to me!!!
1- Right now for some reason I am very worried about explaining little D's birthstory to her....I am worried that she will be sad, I am worried we won't explain it right...won't explain it early enough....or we will start talking to soon....will she be angry, will she be distant, will she be ok...my stomach is in knots about it...I know she will have all of those emotions, and they are all ok and normal...I just want to do the right thing for her, so I worry!
2- We have weddings coming up in our family...and with weddings you have drama...I am worried about the drama...people are sad, people are happy, people are angry, people are frustrated and then there are people like me, trying to stay neutral...but I worry....I worry that both days will be the best days they can be for those beautiful blushing brides...how can I make this better for them...I worry!
3- I worry about my new business...was this the right time...will it be successful....will the amazing team I hired be satisfied and love us just as much as we love them...will this make the income I hope for, for my family...I worry!
4- We need our roof done at our cottage...I worry...(ok T I hope you read that one...call the roofing company already!!!!!!! lol)
5- Life changes once you have a baby...no one can prepare you for this...you can talk to a zillion people about it but you will have NO idea until it happens....it changes how you think, it changes your relationships...you are happy, but tired, stressed...it changes your marriage...am I taking enough time with T, do we need to have more dates, more chats...I worry!
6- I am going to be a bridesmaid in June....will the dresses be short....I worry!!! haha that is just a joke but secretly GAWD I hope I don't have to show these god awful knees...hehe
7- My Dad, my Mom...I worry!
8- Should I make sensory bins, is D watching too much TV...to much Barney not enough reading time...is my patience wearing thin too much...am I doing a good job as a Mom...oh man I worry!
9- I have bad teeth...once I had 8 cavaties in 1 visit....so you can imagine...am I flossing enough, brushing long enough...with the right brush...ughghhhg I worry!
10- am I eating too many carbs not enough freaking protein...seriously...come on....I worry!!!
11- and last but not least....should I really have bought that pair of skinny leathery jean things....like really these legs in those pants...hmmmmm.....I worry!!!
So as you can see I worry...about silly things sometimes and very serious things sometimes....but man this girl needs some sleep...I had to get some of these things off my chest! So thanks for listening....this mama is going to sleep pretty tonight...thanks to you and the red....( red wine that is....oh yeah one more...do I drink too much....probably...that is one thing I don't worry one bit about!!!)
**** my spell check won't work...so now on top of it all I am really worried that this post is full of typos....ughghhghggh :)
Friday, October 12, 2012
Fun Facts Friday
1. I am sitting here on a bright but cold Friday morning, with little "d" on my lap watching her try to feed her breakfast to her favorite stuffed toy sheep Wooly...with Barney serenading us, in his oh so cheerful perfectly purple way....and I couldn't imagine being anywhere else!
2. I'm not sure if it is the change in the weather or what, but I can't seem to drag my arse out of bed in the morning to workout and even worse then that I have this sudden strong urge to cook and bake all sorts of comfy satisfying treats. Ughghg not a good combo!!
3. I only have 4 appointments left until Christmas Eve at work...this is causing me huge anxiety...I can't stand not being able to fit everyone in....blahhhhhh
4. I am so SO looking forward to our night out this Saturday with some of our friends....a. Can't wait to catch up with them, it is always too long in between visits b. We need to get out!!! Geesh this toddler play zone is wearing me down...lol lol not really but it will be nice to have some good ole adult company!!
5. I made the best vegetable beef minestrone soup this week with our left over beef tenderloin from Thanksgiving(yes we served beef not turkey, which in many ways was a strange decision considering the recalls on beef and the fact that everyone loves turkey except T and I...oh we'll they came and they ate and I think left happy...lol) anyways here is the recipe....I used quinoa instead of orzo and it was delish but I am sure it would be super good with the orzo as well!!
6. This Wed I had to do an interview for our local newspaper, it is an article to promote our new day spa that we just added to our salon! It was so funny, my "interviewer" and i use that title lightly was not very prepared so it felt like I was doing all the talking and not being asked any questions!!! So we will see how this turns out....the worst part....he needed picture...of me...blahhhh the one time I wished I would have listened to my girlfriend explain how she does all those "poses" for the camera. I tried but it think it is going to be one big FAIL.
7. I bought leather type jeans last week?!?! Not sure what I was thinking!!
8. Here are a few things that I may attempt this weekend.
9. I am totally in love with this basement.....hmmm too soon for a redo???
I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend!!
Enjoy!!!
I found this quote on pinterest this week and love it!
2. I'm not sure if it is the change in the weather or what, but I can't seem to drag my arse out of bed in the morning to workout and even worse then that I have this sudden strong urge to cook and bake all sorts of comfy satisfying treats. Ughghg not a good combo!!
3. I only have 4 appointments left until Christmas Eve at work...this is causing me huge anxiety...I can't stand not being able to fit everyone in....blahhhhhh
4. I am so SO looking forward to our night out this Saturday with some of our friends....a. Can't wait to catch up with them, it is always too long in between visits b. We need to get out!!! Geesh this toddler play zone is wearing me down...lol lol not really but it will be nice to have some good ole adult company!!
5. I made the best vegetable beef minestrone soup this week with our left over beef tenderloin from Thanksgiving(yes we served beef not turkey, which in many ways was a strange decision considering the recalls on beef and the fact that everyone loves turkey except T and I...oh we'll they came and they ate and I think left happy...lol) anyways here is the recipe....I used quinoa instead of orzo and it was delish but I am sure it would be super good with the orzo as well!!
6. This Wed I had to do an interview for our local newspaper, it is an article to promote our new day spa that we just added to our salon! It was so funny, my "interviewer" and i use that title lightly was not very prepared so it felt like I was doing all the talking and not being asked any questions!!! So we will see how this turns out....the worst part....he needed picture...of me...blahhhh the one time I wished I would have listened to my girlfriend explain how she does all those "poses" for the camera. I tried but it think it is going to be one big FAIL.
7. I bought leather type jeans last week?!?! Not sure what I was thinking!!
8. Here are a few things that I may attempt this weekend.
9. I am totally in love with this basement.....hmmm too soon for a redo???
I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend!!
Enjoy!!!
I found this quote on pinterest this week and love it!
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Monday, October 8, 2012
What are you thankful for??
Wow it's been a week or so since I have posted! Crazy times in my household....days with a busy toddler, opening a new business, and just hosted Thanksgiving for 18 yesterday! A fantastic time we did have!! I guess those are a few reasons why posting has been pushed to the back burner this past week!
Thanksgiving here in the great white north, this weekend...I think thanksgiving is slowly becoming one of my most favorite holidays! It doesn't have the stress of Christmas in all its gift giving glory...Thanksgiving is calmer...it kind of sneaks up on you in a really cozy, apple cinnamon scented candle, pumpkin pie eating sort of way!!
We had both of our families join us at our place yesterday....it was a perfect day! Lots of laughs, lots of food, lots of wine!! We even had a cute little golden retriever pup Phoebe join us!! YES a dog was in my house..free...diving between my feet as I prepared green beans....I know this is shocking and down right unheard of...stay tuned for a post about the puppy dilemma soon!!
As always today is a day to sit and acknowledge the things we are most thankful for. I have so many this year....it is crazy what the last 2 years of our life have been like...downright nuts to be honest. I think right at this moment I am most thankful for the calm....everything feels right and good and calm right now and I love it!! I don't have butterflies in my stomach...I'm not up every hour worried about something....things are just nice...boring ....calm....ahhhhhh I have waited a long time for this feeling to surface again!!
I have tons and tons of other things on my most thankful list...too many to write about...or bore you with...I hope you all have a list a mile long as well!!
Happy Turkey day folks..
M
Thanksgiving here in the great white north, this weekend...I think thanksgiving is slowly becoming one of my most favorite holidays! It doesn't have the stress of Christmas in all its gift giving glory...Thanksgiving is calmer...it kind of sneaks up on you in a really cozy, apple cinnamon scented candle, pumpkin pie eating sort of way!!
We had both of our families join us at our place yesterday....it was a perfect day! Lots of laughs, lots of food, lots of wine!! We even had a cute little golden retriever pup Phoebe join us!! YES a dog was in my house..free...diving between my feet as I prepared green beans....I know this is shocking and down right unheard of...stay tuned for a post about the puppy dilemma soon!!
As always today is a day to sit and acknowledge the things we are most thankful for. I have so many this year....it is crazy what the last 2 years of our life have been like...downright nuts to be honest. I think right at this moment I am most thankful for the calm....everything feels right and good and calm right now and I love it!! I don't have butterflies in my stomach...I'm not up every hour worried about something....things are just nice...boring ....calm....ahhhhhh I have waited a long time for this feeling to surface again!!
I have tons and tons of other things on my most thankful list...too many to write about...or bore you with...I hope you all have a list a mile long as well!!
Happy Turkey day folks..
M
Friday, September 28, 2012
I'm a HOOPIN!!!
OMG...I have found a new love!! Yes I know this happens a lot!! No it's not a craft, no it's not a man...not a new lipstick colour that I can't live without....it's a home made Hula Hoop I made myself this week!!
Have you guys tried this new craze hitting gyms, school rec halls and SAHM's basements all over the country....this hoop dancing totally ROCKS!!
Ok so I am no expert...lol I only have 2 nights under my belt...and a few gashes in our cieling and an almost broken lamp...(yes T has since moved all valuable objects that were getting in the line of my beloved purple hoop!!)
At the beginning of the week a FB friend posted a video of herself hoop dancing and she was brilliant...amazing...she has been doing it for about 4 months and I wanna be just like her!!! hmmpf!!!
So I googled and I YouTubrd until I figured this out...sent T on a mission to Lowe's to get me some supplies, we constructed and then I was on my way! Easy Peasy and so so much fun!! I have been hanging out with a big piece of irrigation tubing made into a hoop and wrapped in bright purple duck tape...."You Tubing" every tutorial in sight, sweating like crazy and loving every minute of it!!
You have to try this or at least YouTube it!!! :)
Happy Hooping Everyone!!
m
Ok so I am no expert...lol I only have 2 nights under my belt...and a few gashes in our cieling and an almost broken lamp...(yes T has since moved all valuable objects that were getting in the line of my beloved purple hoop!!)
At the beginning of the week a FB friend posted a video of herself hoop dancing and she was brilliant...amazing...she has been doing it for about 4 months and I wanna be just like her!!! hmmpf!!!
So I googled and I YouTubrd until I figured this out...sent T on a mission to Lowe's to get me some supplies, we constructed and then I was on my way! Easy Peasy and so so much fun!! I have been hanging out with a big piece of irrigation tubing made into a hoop and wrapped in bright purple duck tape...."You Tubing" every tutorial in sight, sweating like crazy and loving every minute of it!!
You have to try this or at least YouTube it!!! :)
Happy Hooping Everyone!!
m
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Wordless Wednesday!!
Our Thanksgiving "thankful tree"!! We write down things we are thankful for from now until Thanksgiving. We will read them all together on Thanksgiving Day.... And yes one of mine is nap time!! hehe
Sunday, September 23, 2012
Bossy Pants
I am a boss!!
It is by far the absolute toughest job that I have...it takes the cake over Mom, Hairstylist, Wife, Home Maker, Chef, Decorator, Personal Shopper...domestic goodness...everything...being a boss to 10 very energetic, artistic and very different women keeps me on my toes every single day!!
I have to be honest, it is the job I least like as well. I hate being the "boss"...or "she" as I am sometimes referred to....you know it... you know what I am saying, especially if you have a boss or have ever had a boss(which if you haven't, all I can say is WOW how did you manage that)...you know what is said....sometimes things like "well she said it was OK" or "He doesn't like it done like that"...hey I know, bosses even though you may like them you don't REALLY like them...it is an unwritten rule somewhere, be scared of the boss...they are the enemy! Which just totally BLOWS when you happen to be the boss!!! I hate it, I want to be every one's friend...however I am smart enough and have been doing this gig for long enough that I know, friends we can not be!! It just doesn't work!!
In the past 16 months I have been kind of the absentee boss....I have only been working 3 days a week and am home the rest of the time with little D! Which I love and wouldn't change for a second....and I would bet millions of dollars that my team loves this little away time as well!!! Can you imagine, your boss goes from being in your face literally 24/7 to hardly at all, because when she is there she is SO swamped she doesn't even have time to keep her own head on straight!! Yep you guessed it, they have been having a PAAARTY for the past 16 months!! Not that they haven't done a super job at keeping up with clients and all the day to day tasks, actually they have done more than that, they have been amazing and supportive of me and my decision to stay home for these precious days with D...I couldn't have asked for a better group of girls...however over time rules start disappearing, things start becoming more and more relaxed until we get to a point like this Saturday when "she" finally has had ENOUGH!!
Yep it started building a few months ago....and it has just been topping out at the boiling point for the past 2 weeks....nothing major just little things not getting done, people coming and going as they please, tiny little things that inevitably become big HUGE things if left alone. I will admit it, I am the queen of letting things go....I HATE CONFRONTATION...can I say that again I HATE CONFRONTATION....I would rather put up with tons of shit, get shit on, take shit out...before I confront people...it is one of my worst qualities.
So what did I do....I wrote a message to everyone....I know shameful....I am just so bad at talking about the hard stuff face to face...I don't want to hurt any ones feelings, I don't want anyone to hate me, it is so ridiculous!! I like to tell myself it is because we can never find a time to get everyone together due to schedules etc...but yeah right, bosses call staff meetings all the time....command performances as my last boss called them....(who by the way was the most frightening man on the planet, one of the reasons I try so hard to be the "nice boss")!
So I sent out this message with as much encouraging stuff in it as there was expectations on performance etc. etc...so I guess we will see what happens now....will there be a change! I guess time will tell!!
ugggghhhh seriously if someone could find me a backbone please send it ASAP....lol this not so bossy boss really needs it!!
Happy Sunday Everyone!
m
It is by far the absolute toughest job that I have...it takes the cake over Mom, Hairstylist, Wife, Home Maker, Chef, Decorator, Personal Shopper...domestic goodness...everything...being a boss to 10 very energetic, artistic and very different women keeps me on my toes every single day!!
I have to be honest, it is the job I least like as well. I hate being the "boss"...or "she" as I am sometimes referred to....you know it... you know what I am saying, especially if you have a boss or have ever had a boss(which if you haven't, all I can say is WOW how did you manage that)...you know what is said....sometimes things like "well she said it was OK" or "He doesn't like it done like that"...hey I know, bosses even though you may like them you don't REALLY like them...it is an unwritten rule somewhere, be scared of the boss...they are the enemy! Which just totally BLOWS when you happen to be the boss!!! I hate it, I want to be every one's friend...however I am smart enough and have been doing this gig for long enough that I know, friends we can not be!! It just doesn't work!!
In the past 16 months I have been kind of the absentee boss....I have only been working 3 days a week and am home the rest of the time with little D! Which I love and wouldn't change for a second....and I would bet millions of dollars that my team loves this little away time as well!!! Can you imagine, your boss goes from being in your face literally 24/7 to hardly at all, because when she is there she is SO swamped she doesn't even have time to keep her own head on straight!! Yep you guessed it, they have been having a PAAARTY for the past 16 months!! Not that they haven't done a super job at keeping up with clients and all the day to day tasks, actually they have done more than that, they have been amazing and supportive of me and my decision to stay home for these precious days with D...I couldn't have asked for a better group of girls...however over time rules start disappearing, things start becoming more and more relaxed until we get to a point like this Saturday when "she" finally has had ENOUGH!!
Yep it started building a few months ago....and it has just been topping out at the boiling point for the past 2 weeks....nothing major just little things not getting done, people coming and going as they please, tiny little things that inevitably become big HUGE things if left alone. I will admit it, I am the queen of letting things go....I HATE CONFRONTATION...can I say that again I HATE CONFRONTATION....I would rather put up with tons of shit, get shit on, take shit out...before I confront people...it is one of my worst qualities.
So what did I do....I wrote a message to everyone....I know shameful....I am just so bad at talking about the hard stuff face to face...I don't want to hurt any ones feelings, I don't want anyone to hate me, it is so ridiculous!! I like to tell myself it is because we can never find a time to get everyone together due to schedules etc...but yeah right, bosses call staff meetings all the time....command performances as my last boss called them....(who by the way was the most frightening man on the planet, one of the reasons I try so hard to be the "nice boss")!
So I sent out this message with as much encouraging stuff in it as there was expectations on performance etc. etc...so I guess we will see what happens now....will there be a change! I guess time will tell!!
ugggghhhh seriously if someone could find me a backbone please send it ASAP....lol this not so bossy boss really needs it!!
Happy Sunday Everyone!
m
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Once upon a time!
Once upon I time, I started a blog....named Bloggin Instyle. I don't know what possessed me to do it at the time...I think I was filling a void of some sort...however I have always had the urge to write(which is hilarious because if you have read even 1 of my posts you can see that my grammar sucks and thankfully we have spellcheck ha)...I do remember as a young girl though telling my Mom I was going to start a book about my life...well I think I got a few pages down and then in true Michelle style I went on to the next creative outlet I could find...who knows...maybe I started to hook a rug, or begged my Grandmother to once again show me how to knit(how I wish I would have retained that skill she so patiently taught me), but the point is I always wanted to write...journals never cut if for me though....maybe it's my desire to be in the public but not really be in the "public"...or maybe it was simply that I saw a friend on FB say that she started a blog and I wanted to see what all the hype was about(she doesn't have a blog anymore, go figure)!
So I started this blog and I loved it LOVED it....I loved being able to write my own story, whether others read it or not I just loved to get it out. I guess it was therapeutic in some way. There were some things that did drive me nuts though, the fact that you have no idea who is reading it and when I first started I made what I think was a mistake for me personally, I displayed my blog on my FB page so of course my 400 hundred "closest" friends had access....and at the time I thought that is what I wanted. But as time went on, and clients came in and would say, "I read on your blog" or, "oh how was that shopping trip" etc etc....it just seemed a bit wrong and a tad creepy...but I soldiered on, loving the wonderful connections I was making...meeting women who were also struggling with infertility and adoption, other stylists, other women just like me!! I was loving pouring my heart out and having people enjoying my posts...laughing and crying with me but most of all supporting me on my journey.
After months of having the blog up and running a few not so nice things happened. I had a few different people in my life confront me about some of the things I had said in my posts...and these were important people in my life...so I cared! Yes everything I was writing was truly how I was feeling....things were never written to hurt others...honestly like I said earlier I had no idea that these friends were reading my blog...however they were and they were hurt, and that hurt me. Did we clear the air, I hope so, I truly believe we did. However to be honest I never truly forgave myself, I really felt awful about hurting friends feelings on my blog....but I continued to write.
Then one day when I was feeling very down about our lack of adoption opportunities and just feeling so so sad I wrote a post about adoption and a group of women read it and very strongly disagreed with what I was saying.....they commented and called me every nasty shitty name in the book, terrible things...I just couldn't believe my eyes(however I had never had so much traffic on my little blog lol)....I know now this happens and I know that people are not always going to agree with you...but this hit the core of me....I was distraught over it.
After those few episodes my desire for blogging dwindled a bit....I would still write from time to time but just wasn't feeling it. Until somewhere between failed adoption number 1 and Little D arriving I stopped completely. I maybe posted 4 times in the past few years. It's too bad really because the last year and a half would have won me some bloggy prizes I'm sure, cause this road has been super bumpy......however I really didn't give Bloggin Instyle a thought....until Labour Day 2012 hit!!!
My sweet bloggy cousin Britt, you can find her @ www.takingordersfromacookie.com was just getting her blog going...so we spent the weekend talking about blogs and potential posts and klout scores etc etc...as we chatted I pulled up the ole blogger account and there she was Bloggin Instyle..."now a family of three page"....hmmm it had been awhile...there were even some old comments that I hadn't published, some sweet bloggy awards...Britt and I talked about blogs all weekend and she said M you have to start again...come on...do it....
So here I am....starting again!!!!! I hope to stay....I hope to make connections, I hope to make you think, ponder, wish, dream maybe even cry and most definitely do your best belly laugh from time to time. What I don't mean to ever do is hurt you, anyone...from family members that tune in, to friends or clients..or people I have never meet face to face....I am truly writing how I feel, writing from my heart. I hope you will join me as I saddle up once again and start Bloggin Instyle!!!
m
xo
So I started this blog and I loved it LOVED it....I loved being able to write my own story, whether others read it or not I just loved to get it out. I guess it was therapeutic in some way. There were some things that did drive me nuts though, the fact that you have no idea who is reading it and when I first started I made what I think was a mistake for me personally, I displayed my blog on my FB page so of course my 400 hundred "closest" friends had access....and at the time I thought that is what I wanted. But as time went on, and clients came in and would say, "I read on your blog" or, "oh how was that shopping trip" etc etc....it just seemed a bit wrong and a tad creepy...but I soldiered on, loving the wonderful connections I was making...meeting women who were also struggling with infertility and adoption, other stylists, other women just like me!! I was loving pouring my heart out and having people enjoying my posts...laughing and crying with me but most of all supporting me on my journey.
After months of having the blog up and running a few not so nice things happened. I had a few different people in my life confront me about some of the things I had said in my posts...and these were important people in my life...so I cared! Yes everything I was writing was truly how I was feeling....things were never written to hurt others...honestly like I said earlier I had no idea that these friends were reading my blog...however they were and they were hurt, and that hurt me. Did we clear the air, I hope so, I truly believe we did. However to be honest I never truly forgave myself, I really felt awful about hurting friends feelings on my blog....but I continued to write.
Then one day when I was feeling very down about our lack of adoption opportunities and just feeling so so sad I wrote a post about adoption and a group of women read it and very strongly disagreed with what I was saying.....they commented and called me every nasty shitty name in the book, terrible things...I just couldn't believe my eyes(however I had never had so much traffic on my little blog lol)....I know now this happens and I know that people are not always going to agree with you...but this hit the core of me....I was distraught over it.
After those few episodes my desire for blogging dwindled a bit....I would still write from time to time but just wasn't feeling it. Until somewhere between failed adoption number 1 and Little D arriving I stopped completely. I maybe posted 4 times in the past few years. It's too bad really because the last year and a half would have won me some bloggy prizes I'm sure, cause this road has been super bumpy......however I really didn't give Bloggin Instyle a thought....until Labour Day 2012 hit!!!
My sweet bloggy cousin Britt, you can find her @ www.takingordersfromacookie.com was just getting her blog going...so we spent the weekend talking about blogs and potential posts and klout scores etc etc...as we chatted I pulled up the ole blogger account and there she was Bloggin Instyle..."now a family of three page"....hmmm it had been awhile...there were even some old comments that I hadn't published, some sweet bloggy awards...Britt and I talked about blogs all weekend and she said M you have to start again...come on...do it....
So here I am....starting again!!!!! I hope to stay....I hope to make connections, I hope to make you think, ponder, wish, dream maybe even cry and most definitely do your best belly laugh from time to time. What I don't mean to ever do is hurt you, anyone...from family members that tune in, to friends or clients..or people I have never meet face to face....I am truly writing how I feel, writing from my heart. I hope you will join me as I saddle up once again and start Bloggin Instyle!!!
m
xo
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Quirky Question Tuesday!!
When you are a hairstylist or anyone that chats continuously day in and day out with different people, the material that you are given on a daily basis that you could blog about is endless!!! Seriously, the things people say to me is just out of this world sometimes. I could never fully give each ridiculous comment it's due time on this blog and furthermore some of the sarcastic remarks I have in rebuttal should probably be kept to myself!
However some are just too good to keep to myself, they must be shared with the world(haha, or the few people that might be reading my posts!), because man they are that good! So I thought I might do a weekly post on the quirky, crazy downright nutty questions or comments I get....I will post my fav each week. Now I have NO idea who reads this blog......sooooooo with that being said, if you are a client, a friend, an enemy(hmmmm hope I quote you someday), or maybe a coworker, a family member or I have no idea who you are you just struck me as funny....well sorry guys try not to take offense, because this is just a little step inside my world...I say be proud...you my lovely take the prize, the favorite of the week! Whatever you did or said was a keeper...you kept me giggling or thinking or crying for days...you my friend actually took up some headspace, and quite honestly because I talk to so many people I can barely remember who I worked on at the end of a day let alone what they said to me!! So "good on ya" as my uncle would say in his really disturbing Australian accent....you are the reason I have something to write about today!!
So as I am sitting here trying to think of the best from last week (a heaping handful are coming to my mind)...I must stress some of these questions will be funny, some will be serious and some will be downright mouth dropping ridiculous!! To start us off though I think I will try to keep this light!
So this weeks question and let me give you some background here...this particular someone has just looked at my most recent pics of D that sit on my station at the salon...she has admired them "ohhhh what a dolly, she is so precious...and getting so big" you know the drill...and then it comes, the craziest thing I have heard yet in reference to little D!
"M, Little Miss D's hair used to be so dark...I can't believe that you are coloring it so young"
WHAT???? I seriously thought I would look up from my perfectly angled, angled bob to see a twinkle in her eye...you know when you can see the laughter, the haha good joke hey!!...Nope nada nothing, completely blank, questioning look....waiting for my response?!?!?
Come on people...I realize I have access to literally every colour in the rainbow, but do you really think I would colour my 15month olds lid..maybe some stylists do, but not this momma....I barely have time to get my own hair coloured, as I painstakingly yank yet again a crop of nasty grey's as we speak!
So I looked at her, choked on my most sarcastic response(remember at this point she is still a paying customer....I'm repeatedly chanting the customers always right the customers always right) so I said "oh no no I don't colour D's hair...it is the sun...the sun and just the normal process for a baby...lots are born with dark dark hair and are white blonde by the time they are 1. "Really", she said "I have never heard of that". End of conversation!
....and you have 3 grown children....
I don't know but that question really struck me as funny, odd, and a bit worrisome...lol So just in case anyone is wondering no I haven't hi lighted, streaked, ombred, or even glossed D's hair as of yet!! Keep a close eye though, you just never know!
M
However some are just too good to keep to myself, they must be shared with the world(haha, or the few people that might be reading my posts!), because man they are that good! So I thought I might do a weekly post on the quirky, crazy downright nutty questions or comments I get....I will post my fav each week. Now I have NO idea who reads this blog......sooooooo with that being said, if you are a client, a friend, an enemy(hmmmm hope I quote you someday), or maybe a coworker, a family member or I have no idea who you are you just struck me as funny....well sorry guys try not to take offense, because this is just a little step inside my world...I say be proud...you my lovely take the prize, the favorite of the week! Whatever you did or said was a keeper...you kept me giggling or thinking or crying for days...you my friend actually took up some headspace, and quite honestly because I talk to so many people I can barely remember who I worked on at the end of a day let alone what they said to me!! So "good on ya" as my uncle would say in his really disturbing Australian accent....you are the reason I have something to write about today!!
So as I am sitting here trying to think of the best from last week (a heaping handful are coming to my mind)...I must stress some of these questions will be funny, some will be serious and some will be downright mouth dropping ridiculous!! To start us off though I think I will try to keep this light!
So this weeks question and let me give you some background here...this particular someone has just looked at my most recent pics of D that sit on my station at the salon...she has admired them "ohhhh what a dolly, she is so precious...and getting so big" you know the drill...and then it comes, the craziest thing I have heard yet in reference to little D!
"M, Little Miss D's hair used to be so dark...I can't believe that you are coloring it so young"
WHAT???? I seriously thought I would look up from my perfectly angled, angled bob to see a twinkle in her eye...you know when you can see the laughter, the haha good joke hey!!...Nope nada nothing, completely blank, questioning look....waiting for my response?!?!?
Come on people...I realize I have access to literally every colour in the rainbow, but do you really think I would colour my 15month olds lid..maybe some stylists do, but not this momma....I barely have time to get my own hair coloured, as I painstakingly yank yet again a crop of nasty grey's as we speak!
So I looked at her, choked on my most sarcastic response(remember at this point she is still a paying customer....I'm repeatedly chanting the customers always right the customers always right) so I said "oh no no I don't colour D's hair...it is the sun...the sun and just the normal process for a baby...lots are born with dark dark hair and are white blonde by the time they are 1. "Really", she said "I have never heard of that". End of conversation!
....and you have 3 grown children....
I don't know but that question really struck me as funny, odd, and a bit worrisome...lol So just in case anyone is wondering no I haven't hi lighted, streaked, ombred, or even glossed D's hair as of yet!! Keep a close eye though, you just never know!
M
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Our Terry Fox!
One year ago today, my Mom and I were walking the trail doing our first ever Terry Fox fundraising event. I would be lying if I said it wasn't with heavy hearts that we walked.
It was a very emotional time, my Dad had just finished his 5th round of nasty chemo and had made the decision that he would not take anymore....we were all still waiting on word if he was eligible for a crazy radical surgery to remove his left lung, the linings of his lung and heart and part of his diaphragm. Did we want him to have this surgery or didn't we....it was so risky, chance of survival was questionable and with only a 15% chance of getting all the cancer....we were walking in a cloud...just not sure of what to think or feel.
I remember my Mom turning to me and saying "well I wonder if your Dad will be able to walk this with us next year"? I have to be honest my heart sank...and tears started to well up in my eyes....I didn't want to put a damper on her momentary high spirits...however I wasn't feeling quite as optimistic. I'm sure I made some sort of remark...positive I hope, but inside I was not feeling that hopeful.
Fast forward one year and boy I am glad I was So So wrong!!!! Today was team DMF's second Terry Fox Run. Not only was our team bigger and better....not only did we raise yet again an incredible amount of money...not only did we get snapped up to be in our local paper...yes the local paparazzi was there....not only did little D look absolutely adorable in her own tinsy Team DMF shirt....not only did we go out for a big ole family lunch after....not only was there absolutely NO family drama(and folks that's big with this group) not only all of those things....but the best the absolute best was that my Dad, Team DMF's own personal Terry Fox walked...OH yes he did!!! Incredible! One lung later...100 days in ICU later...after infections, stage 4 lung cancer aggressive diagnosis later....
He WALKED!!!
As I have said before....we don't know what the future holds...but man are we taking every advantage of these days....the bonus days....the small miracles, like being able to take that walk with us!!!
Dad you are our Terry Fox!
xo
It was a very emotional time, my Dad had just finished his 5th round of nasty chemo and had made the decision that he would not take anymore....we were all still waiting on word if he was eligible for a crazy radical surgery to remove his left lung, the linings of his lung and heart and part of his diaphragm. Did we want him to have this surgery or didn't we....it was so risky, chance of survival was questionable and with only a 15% chance of getting all the cancer....we were walking in a cloud...just not sure of what to think or feel.
I remember my Mom turning to me and saying "well I wonder if your Dad will be able to walk this with us next year"? I have to be honest my heart sank...and tears started to well up in my eyes....I didn't want to put a damper on her momentary high spirits...however I wasn't feeling quite as optimistic. I'm sure I made some sort of remark...positive I hope, but inside I was not feeling that hopeful.
Fast forward one year and boy I am glad I was So So wrong!!!! Today was team DMF's second Terry Fox Run. Not only was our team bigger and better....not only did we raise yet again an incredible amount of money...not only did we get snapped up to be in our local paper...yes the local paparazzi was there....not only did little D look absolutely adorable in her own tinsy Team DMF shirt....not only did we go out for a big ole family lunch after....not only was there absolutely NO family drama(and folks that's big with this group) not only all of those things....but the best the absolute best was that my Dad, Team DMF's own personal Terry Fox walked...OH yes he did!!! Incredible! One lung later...100 days in ICU later...after infections, stage 4 lung cancer aggressive diagnosis later....
He WALKED!!!
As I have said before....we don't know what the future holds...but man are we taking every advantage of these days....the bonus days....the small miracles, like being able to take that walk with us!!!
Dad you are our Terry Fox!
xo
The CrazY Tantrums!
This week was one of those weeks your mother never warned you about.
Parenting 101...well she forgot this little chapter...yeah she mentioned it, but I was not aware that it would happen at the very young age of 15 months!
Have you guessed what it is, I know if you have kids 1 and older you have experienced it as well. Yes the week of the TANTRUM!!!
Holy moly, move over terrible twos cause we have an over achiever here and she would like to start this phase early....like last Wed or so!!
It all started with this really evil look she started giving when you are doing or asking her to do something that she is really not that fancy on. WOW is all I can say...this girls looks could kill!!
Then she decided that the look wasn't really getting her anywhere...except people making comments like "oh boy wait until she is a teenage, she is going to give you a run for your money" and they were saying these things to me...so totally back-firing for little miss D, she was thinking what the heck is wrong with you people this look is to get you to pay attention to me not my mother...clearly this wasn't working for her.
So she decided to get her body involved in the action....and this folks is something that you just have to see...or maybe you do right in your own living room....the act of forming your body into a human pretzel...she folds her body in half at her torso...feet planted firmly on the ground while the top of her head hits the floor....it is amazing and through all that her hands are flailing, feet start stomping and she is screaming at the top of her lungs! IMPRESSIVE!! This is were things get difficult for me...it is so entertaining and downright hysterical!! How do you not laugh, but at the same time I am so frustrated with her as well that I really feel like stomping my feet around the house...and truth be told I sometimes do!!! lol
I know you are thinking wow 15 months this is a bit early...and you haven't even heard the worst of it yet!!!
I made a very big parenting mistake on Friday....I should have consulted with the Mommy Club because this was a doosey....I took D to TOY r US.....I know I should be punished, where was my head....please forgive me for my ignorance!!
Don't worry though I paid for it, for my stupidity...she was terrible as you can imagine and who could blame her she was in rainbow coloured, sesame street, mega blocks heaven. Can we say OVER-STIMULATION????
Thank goodness my Mom was with me and Grandmas kind of have that calming affect on everyone don't they..."don't worry dear, she is fine...I'll push the cart you just go get what you need"....as I cross the store all I hear is my childs screeching voice at the top of her lungs...I guess I should feel lucky that she can't really say anything that makes sense right now so what she was really saying no one could understand....because I am positive it would have sounded something like this..."I want that and that and that and if you don't buy it for me I'm going to make the rest of your day a living hell"....and sure enough that is what she did!!
Whew this parenting gig is tough....and I know, I know the Mommy Group made it very clear...it has only just begun!!!!
Happy Sunday Everyone!
m
Parenting 101...well she forgot this little chapter...yeah she mentioned it, but I was not aware that it would happen at the very young age of 15 months!
Have you guessed what it is, I know if you have kids 1 and older you have experienced it as well. Yes the week of the TANTRUM!!!
Holy moly, move over terrible twos cause we have an over achiever here and she would like to start this phase early....like last Wed or so!!
It all started with this really evil look she started giving when you are doing or asking her to do something that she is really not that fancy on. WOW is all I can say...this girls looks could kill!!
Then she decided that the look wasn't really getting her anywhere...except people making comments like "oh boy wait until she is a teenage, she is going to give you a run for your money" and they were saying these things to me...so totally back-firing for little miss D, she was thinking what the heck is wrong with you people this look is to get you to pay attention to me not my mother...clearly this wasn't working for her.
So she decided to get her body involved in the action....and this folks is something that you just have to see...or maybe you do right in your own living room....the act of forming your body into a human pretzel...she folds her body in half at her torso...feet planted firmly on the ground while the top of her head hits the floor....it is amazing and through all that her hands are flailing, feet start stomping and she is screaming at the top of her lungs! IMPRESSIVE!! This is were things get difficult for me...it is so entertaining and downright hysterical!! How do you not laugh, but at the same time I am so frustrated with her as well that I really feel like stomping my feet around the house...and truth be told I sometimes do!!! lol
I know you are thinking wow 15 months this is a bit early...and you haven't even heard the worst of it yet!!!
I made a very big parenting mistake on Friday....I should have consulted with the Mommy Club because this was a doosey....I took D to TOY r US.....I know I should be punished, where was my head....please forgive me for my ignorance!!
Don't worry though I paid for it, for my stupidity...she was terrible as you can imagine and who could blame her she was in rainbow coloured, sesame street, mega blocks heaven. Can we say OVER-STIMULATION????
Thank goodness my Mom was with me and Grandmas kind of have that calming affect on everyone don't they..."don't worry dear, she is fine...I'll push the cart you just go get what you need"....as I cross the store all I hear is my childs screeching voice at the top of her lungs...I guess I should feel lucky that she can't really say anything that makes sense right now so what she was really saying no one could understand....because I am positive it would have sounded something like this..."I want that and that and that and if you don't buy it for me I'm going to make the rest of your day a living hell"....and sure enough that is what she did!!
Whew this parenting gig is tough....and I know, I know the Mommy Group made it very clear...it has only just begun!!!!
Happy Sunday Everyone!
m
Monday, September 10, 2012
Lost and Found...love letters!
A few weeks ago while I was getting my salon ready for its expansion into a full service salon and day spa, I was going through tons of junk very important papers that had been left laying around for, well let's just say WAY WAY to long!!! As I was rooting through all of this stuff I came across a big stack of papers that looked like emails that had been printed off. At the time I just threw them aside, thinking they are probably just some old Aveda information and I wanted to keep at the task at hand...as all busy Momma's know you have to make use of every millisecond that you can get....so I kept trucking...sorting and pitching, it actually became very therapeutic after awhile.
After what seemed like hours of this same tedious job...I took a break and put my feet up. As I sat, that pile of white papers caught my eye...so I took a look...and to my surprise it wasn't just old insurance papers or long forgotten protocols for Aveda Products. It was actually all the emails that "T" had written to me when he was in Vietnam about 7 years ago. What a great find...and just what I needed that day! Honestly it could not have come a better time. Crazy how that happens, things just get plopped right in your lap sometimes with perfect timing!!
You see "T" went to Vietnam when we had only been dating for less than a year...we were still "young and in love" as the story goes...and these emails reminded me of a simpler time, when we only had ourselves and our fresh, perfect relationship to think about. As we all know, life can get busy and hectic and crazy especially when you add kids in the mix(and I know that has only just started for us, that is just going to get crazier and busier)...but sometimes you forget, you forget the really important but simple things about your life.
That stack of paper that almost got pitched, was like finding a treasure...the perfect reminder of all the things I am so so grateful for!
I hope everyone gets a wonderful surprise reminder of the wonderful things in their life sometime soon!
m
After what seemed like hours of this same tedious job...I took a break and put my feet up. As I sat, that pile of white papers caught my eye...so I took a look...and to my surprise it wasn't just old insurance papers or long forgotten protocols for Aveda Products. It was actually all the emails that "T" had written to me when he was in Vietnam about 7 years ago. What a great find...and just what I needed that day! Honestly it could not have come a better time. Crazy how that happens, things just get plopped right in your lap sometimes with perfect timing!!
That stack of paper that almost got pitched, was like finding a treasure...the perfect reminder of all the things I am so so grateful for!
I hope everyone gets a wonderful surprise reminder of the wonderful things in their life sometime soon!
m
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Finding Balance
The million dollar question, where do you find balance? Just that perfect mixture....the recipe for happiness for yourself and your family??
Yes this is something that in your childhood, teen years, 20's and for me most of my 30's, you don't even think about...or at least I didn't. Maybe it comes when you have children...or maybe it just comes with age and maturity. Lately I have found myself wondering how do I get that recipe for success...the perfect blend of work, family, friends, health and happiness for myself and my family?
I will admit I am a "go'er"....actually just this morning T and I were sitting chatting and I mentioned something like "you know that table downstairs, how do you think it would look upstairs"....he just looked at me and said...M come on the spa doors haven't even been open for 24hrs yet and you are already looking for your next project...can't we just let things ride for awhile??? Now I know his response really had nothing to do with the table in question(however we do have differing opinions on if it would look nice there or not), it was more about me...and how I just can't sit still....I always have to be on to the next thing.
So today I have been reflecting on this conversation and myself...my life, my goals...I think I really need to start focusing on finding balance in my life. I think the scales are tipped a bit too far in certain directions and things need to be leveled out.
Work definitely has a bit too much weight and my little family of 3 not enough...I know this and I am strong enough to admit it! Work for almost 17 years has been my life...and it has taken, well 15months to realize it is not the be all and end all....yes I work hard for my family...everything I do there right now is in hopes that in a few years it will enable us to have tons of adventures as a family with no worries at all. However I know that I can't got lost in the future...I have to remember how important the present is...I am trying!
I also struggle with the balance of my social life and things I do for fun...my relationships with girlfriends have changed drastically over the years...my job is so social I am so exhausted at the end of the week that I find it to be a lot of work to "socialize" outside of work...however I find more and more that I miss and need the interaction of girlfriends...real girlfriends that truly get what is going on in these over exerted hormonal bodies all women in their mid thirties have!
There is also the absolute need (for myself anyways) for physical activity! I can honestly say that if I go a few days without it...things are not good...I know that my whole psychi is off if I miss my workouts...I think this is mental for me...but I know that it is an absolute must!
Finally there is family time but then there is the most important time and that is the time spent nurturing and feeding my relationship with T...and as with lots of things in life the thing that should be the most important gets pushed to the back burner...boy have I seen this happen now that we have a toddler in the house...it is crazy...I heard people talk about it but never truly understood...we seriously hardly have 5 seconds a day to talk...and when we do it is just about the "stuff"...the day to day...did you call the exterminator for the cottage, did you call the daycare...that kind of crap...not the important stuff!!
So here I am on a Sunday afternoon, happy, healthy and probably over thinking a bit...but truly wondering and brainstorming ways that I can find the Balance...that perfect blend...!
I think I will start with a big glass of red wine...blended to perfection!!!
m
xo
Yes this is something that in your childhood, teen years, 20's and for me most of my 30's, you don't even think about...or at least I didn't. Maybe it comes when you have children...or maybe it just comes with age and maturity. Lately I have found myself wondering how do I get that recipe for success...the perfect blend of work, family, friends, health and happiness for myself and my family?
I will admit I am a "go'er"....actually just this morning T and I were sitting chatting and I mentioned something like "you know that table downstairs, how do you think it would look upstairs"....he just looked at me and said...M come on the spa doors haven't even been open for 24hrs yet and you are already looking for your next project...can't we just let things ride for awhile??? Now I know his response really had nothing to do with the table in question(however we do have differing opinions on if it would look nice there or not), it was more about me...and how I just can't sit still....I always have to be on to the next thing.
So today I have been reflecting on this conversation and myself...my life, my goals...I think I really need to start focusing on finding balance in my life. I think the scales are tipped a bit too far in certain directions and things need to be leveled out.
Work definitely has a bit too much weight and my little family of 3 not enough...I know this and I am strong enough to admit it! Work for almost 17 years has been my life...and it has taken, well 15months to realize it is not the be all and end all....yes I work hard for my family...everything I do there right now is in hopes that in a few years it will enable us to have tons of adventures as a family with no worries at all. However I know that I can't got lost in the future...I have to remember how important the present is...I am trying!
I also struggle with the balance of my social life and things I do for fun...my relationships with girlfriends have changed drastically over the years...my job is so social I am so exhausted at the end of the week that I find it to be a lot of work to "socialize" outside of work...however I find more and more that I miss and need the interaction of girlfriends...real girlfriends that truly get what is going on in these over exerted hormonal bodies all women in their mid thirties have!
There is also the absolute need (for myself anyways) for physical activity! I can honestly say that if I go a few days without it...things are not good...I know that my whole psychi is off if I miss my workouts...I think this is mental for me...but I know that it is an absolute must!
Finally there is family time but then there is the most important time and that is the time spent nurturing and feeding my relationship with T...and as with lots of things in life the thing that should be the most important gets pushed to the back burner...boy have I seen this happen now that we have a toddler in the house...it is crazy...I heard people talk about it but never truly understood...we seriously hardly have 5 seconds a day to talk...and when we do it is just about the "stuff"...the day to day...did you call the exterminator for the cottage, did you call the daycare...that kind of crap...not the important stuff!!
So here I am on a Sunday afternoon, happy, healthy and probably over thinking a bit...but truly wondering and brainstorming ways that I can find the Balance...that perfect blend...!
I think I will start with a big glass of red wine...blended to perfection!!!
m
xo
Saturday, September 8, 2012
10 years later...my dream is complete!!
I have been styling lovely ladies locks for almost 18 years now....WOW!! 10 years ago I fullfilled my first dream of opening my lovely Aveda Salon...my vision was always to utilize the whole entire space that I have invested in and open a day spa on the second floor!! Well today is the day that dream is finally coming true!! After tons of hard work...amazing support from my husband, family and fabulous staff and of course not to mention my little 15month old rascal...who is surely more of a rascal right now because Mommy has been so preoccupied....however none the less today, my day spa opens!! SO SO excited!!Here is hoping all the toes and hands and brows from my itty bitty town come down and get pampered!!
Happy Day Everyone!
m
Friday, September 7, 2012
Change!
I had a client in, a client that I love! She has been trusting me with her lovely crimson locks for almost 20 years!! WOW that is dedication, loyalty and a bit crazy!!!
Over the years I have obviously got to know her very well. She is a bubbly, carefree, smart woman...I have always admired her and trusted her opinion and expertise on different issues. However today and if I am being honest the past couple years really, I have noticed a change....an interesting change and last week it got me doing a bit of reflecting on a topic that has come up a few times in my life lately!!
CHANGE...is it good, is it bad, does it matter...and why does it get so many people's tail in a knot!! Now let me explain...the changes that I am seeing in this client are changes that I have noticed since she started dating and married her one true love a few years ago. Now the changes in this woman in my opinion are not good, not bad...it is just that she has changed....she seems less tolerant...but more driven...her whole circle of friends have changed, and because I am from a itty bitty town I know that some of her girlfriends are very sad about that...but that is just the way it all turned out...they have different interests now and as couples she doesn't find that they have much in common...this is not a new thing...this happens all the time...I know this, but lately I have been asked this question in so many different ways...shes changed since she met him...she is different...etc etc...and my question is....well isn't that OK...if someone is happy that should be OK? Right?
I feel that, of course once you start spending time with a new person, and truly care for them you will start looking at life with a fresh pair of eyes....you may be presented with thoughts and opinions that had never occurred to you before. I remember this happening when I met T...my whole life I just thought that if my Dad said that it was OK then that was GOOD whatever he did I did...it was T one day that said...ummmm Hello M this isn't how the whole world thinks you know.....WHAT!??!?! REALLY!?!??! I said...lol lol...now this has happened many times since we have been together...sometimes I agree with hubby but and sometimes I am still that sucky Daddy's girl that believes that he is always right....I would say yes if I think back to when T and I met, I have changed. For the better I think....for the better in other peoples opinion?? I hope...but really does it matter...it shouldn't I know...but I guess there is a little part of all of us that wants to make sure our family and friends support our choices.
So what is this ramble all about anyways...honestly I'm not sure...this client struck a cord with me last week...something she said just sounded so much like something her husband would say...I strongly disagreed with what she was saying...(not out loud mind you, hairstylists rule...keep your opinions to yourself especially if they are not the same as the paying lady in your chair lol ) but it made me think WOW in a course of 2-3 years this woman has totally changed her views on things...amazing how time spent with a person can do that....is it good, is it bad...who knows, who cares...she is happy and that is all that matters!!
So I guess I am just thinking, if you are truly happy and feel change happening...embrace it, do what YOUR heart is telling you to do...Enjoy your life...but always be you...that might mean a bit of the new and a bit of the old...Change I guess you just never know when it will happen...enjoy the ride folks!
m
Over the years I have obviously got to know her very well. She is a bubbly, carefree, smart woman...I have always admired her and trusted her opinion and expertise on different issues. However today and if I am being honest the past couple years really, I have noticed a change....an interesting change and last week it got me doing a bit of reflecting on a topic that has come up a few times in my life lately!!
CHANGE...is it good, is it bad, does it matter...and why does it get so many people's tail in a knot!! Now let me explain...the changes that I am seeing in this client are changes that I have noticed since she started dating and married her one true love a few years ago. Now the changes in this woman in my opinion are not good, not bad...it is just that she has changed....she seems less tolerant...but more driven...her whole circle of friends have changed, and because I am from a itty bitty town I know that some of her girlfriends are very sad about that...but that is just the way it all turned out...they have different interests now and as couples she doesn't find that they have much in common...this is not a new thing...this happens all the time...I know this, but lately I have been asked this question in so many different ways...shes changed since she met him...she is different...etc etc...and my question is....well isn't that OK...if someone is happy that should be OK? Right?
I feel that, of course once you start spending time with a new person, and truly care for them you will start looking at life with a fresh pair of eyes....you may be presented with thoughts and opinions that had never occurred to you before. I remember this happening when I met T...my whole life I just thought that if my Dad said that it was OK then that was GOOD whatever he did I did...it was T one day that said...ummmm Hello M this isn't how the whole world thinks you know.....WHAT!??!?! REALLY!?!??! I said...lol lol...now this has happened many times since we have been together...sometimes I agree with hubby but and sometimes I am still that sucky Daddy's girl that believes that he is always right....I would say yes if I think back to when T and I met, I have changed. For the better I think....for the better in other peoples opinion?? I hope...but really does it matter...it shouldn't I know...but I guess there is a little part of all of us that wants to make sure our family and friends support our choices.
So what is this ramble all about anyways...honestly I'm not sure...this client struck a cord with me last week...something she said just sounded so much like something her husband would say...I strongly disagreed with what she was saying...(not out loud mind you, hairstylists rule...keep your opinions to yourself especially if they are not the same as the paying lady in your chair lol ) but it made me think WOW in a course of 2-3 years this woman has totally changed her views on things...amazing how time spent with a person can do that....is it good, is it bad...who knows, who cares...she is happy and that is all that matters!!
So I guess I am just thinking, if you are truly happy and feel change happening...embrace it, do what YOUR heart is telling you to do...Enjoy your life...but always be you...that might mean a bit of the new and a bit of the old...Change I guess you just never know when it will happen...enjoy the ride folks!
m
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
A Fresh Start...extreme, Chalene Extreme that is!
The nightmare began when little "D" turned 9 months old, not sure why that was such a pivotal moment but it was the day that I stepped on the scale for the first time since she had come home. Well I think I must have been the only woman ever to have a 9 month old at home and actually weigh more then when she was born...seriously think about it...most that have their children naturally would by default lost weight without even trying....but this ass had about 10 extra pounds on it...and summer was coming FAST!!! So it was right then and there that I decided it was time to get into action! The 10 came off pretty quickly, with exercise and a better diet, i.e BORING diet...but I was in the groove!
All summer I have been very dedicated to my workouts that took that 10 pounds of unsightly fat off!! Yes I hauled my buns out of bed at 5am on the mornings that I was working and on the days that I was with little "D" I made good use of every napping moment! The program I was doing all summer long was Chalene Johnson's Turbo Fire. I was surprisingly, extremely happy with my results. If the fact that I did wear a bather in front of people this summer is any indication, then I would say the program was a pretty decent success!! lol....because these legs have not seen the light of day for many many years! Now lets be honest here,it wasn't a miracle worker...it was hard hard work and I still have cellulite coming out my ying yang but it was better...so a success in it's own right.
Well then summer happened....long weekends at the cottage, at my Dads infamous outdoor bar where tons of chips and wine are consumed. Don't get me wrong, fun is had by all...but these thighs are starting to scream PLEASE don't do this to me again...I can't stand rubbing into my partner here....OK OK I get the point. It's September, a fresh start...and I think time for a fresh program. I love Turbo Fire so much but I am thinking it is time to add something else into the mix...and sadly that is not chocolate covered almonds...I think it is time for a bit more strength training, combined with the insane cardio that Turbo Fire is. So in an attempt to not spend another 200 bones on yet another program...I hauled out my Chalene Extreme from last year....did a bit of googling and found a perfect little hybrid program combining the 2. Perfect!!
So here goes Week 1!....Oh you thought this is where I was going to do some before and afters...nope...you will have to just read about the results....lol lol
Wish me Luck and tell me, anyone doing a program that they just love right now?
m
All summer I have been very dedicated to my workouts that took that 10 pounds of unsightly fat off!! Yes I hauled my buns out of bed at 5am on the mornings that I was working and on the days that I was with little "D" I made good use of every napping moment! The program I was doing all summer long was Chalene Johnson's Turbo Fire. I was surprisingly, extremely happy with my results. If the fact that I did wear a bather in front of people this summer is any indication, then I would say the program was a pretty decent success!! lol....because these legs have not seen the light of day for many many years! Now lets be honest here,it wasn't a miracle worker...it was hard hard work and I still have cellulite coming out my ying yang but it was better...so a success in it's own right.
Well then summer happened....long weekends at the cottage, at my Dads infamous outdoor bar where tons of chips and wine are consumed. Don't get me wrong, fun is had by all...but these thighs are starting to scream PLEASE don't do this to me again...I can't stand rubbing into my partner here....OK OK I get the point. It's September, a fresh start...and I think time for a fresh program. I love Turbo Fire so much but I am thinking it is time to add something else into the mix...and sadly that is not chocolate covered almonds...I think it is time for a bit more strength training, combined with the insane cardio that Turbo Fire is. So in an attempt to not spend another 200 bones on yet another program...I hauled out my Chalene Extreme from last year....did a bit of googling and found a perfect little hybrid program combining the 2. Perfect!!
Wish me Luck and tell me, anyone doing a program that they just love right now?
m
Monday, September 3, 2012
The tat!
Well hello there! Yes it has been awhile and so much has happened....and pretty much all of it good! Which if you happen to have read this blog in the past will agree that is nothing short of a miracle!
Now I can't possibly get you up to speed in one post...but I am thinking that I might just get into this thing called "bloggin" again! So I promise to back track every once in awhile to give you the highlights!
For today though, I have to tell you about my Dad!
If you have read this blog before then you are aware that my Dad was diagnosed last year with stage 4 lung cancer. Yeah rotten luck hey!!!! So to say the least there have been some really rough patches in the past few years.... However my dad underwent an extremely risking surgery last November, we almost lost him due to various infections and complications but somehow after 100days in the hospital he came home less a lung, less a chunk of his diaphragm and some other various not as important body parts! Here we are 6 months later and the guy was lying on a massage bed face down getting a tattoo on his rear end that says f**k you cancer!
Yes it was a bucket list event....another one ticked off for him! Not a huge tat fan myself...but really this particular occasion I can't help but smile!
My dads spirit is infectious, he feels so truly blessed and lucky to be here, he has been through more pain, torture awful stuff in the past year....it takes my breath away sometimes, how fortunate we are to still have him here with us! A true survivor in my books!
No we don't know what will happen in the future...but for right now we are enjoying every bonus moment we have been given!!
So I'm with you Dad.... F**K you CANCER!!!
Now I can't possibly get you up to speed in one post...but I am thinking that I might just get into this thing called "bloggin" again! So I promise to back track every once in awhile to give you the highlights!
For today though, I have to tell you about my Dad!
If you have read this blog before then you are aware that my Dad was diagnosed last year with stage 4 lung cancer. Yeah rotten luck hey!!!! So to say the least there have been some really rough patches in the past few years.... However my dad underwent an extremely risking surgery last November, we almost lost him due to various infections and complications but somehow after 100days in the hospital he came home less a lung, less a chunk of his diaphragm and some other various not as important body parts! Here we are 6 months later and the guy was lying on a massage bed face down getting a tattoo on his rear end that says f**k you cancer!
Yes it was a bucket list event....another one ticked off for him! Not a huge tat fan myself...but really this particular occasion I can't help but smile!
My dads spirit is infectious, he feels so truly blessed and lucky to be here, he has been through more pain, torture awful stuff in the past year....it takes my breath away sometimes, how fortunate we are to still have him here with us! A true survivor in my books!
No we don't know what will happen in the future...but for right now we are enjoying every bonus moment we have been given!!
So I'm with you Dad.... F**K you CANCER!!!
Friday, February 24, 2012
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