tanks and birks

So this has been a big year for me, most of you have been through all these life changing events that have lead up to this moment....but for those who haven't let me retrace my steps....

-about 8 months ago I woke up with a crazy weird excruciating pain in my left foot....yes remember that people the day that I had to buy Grandma shoes...........yes that day...
-and then there was the day not too long ago that I decided it was time to invest in some strappy summer Grandma shoes....
-so clearly now you can see that I have about 500 bucks tied up in the ugliest foot wear going....but yes yes they are comfy....

Well today has been another big day for my feet and well my whole body actually......I will start off with my feet.....after our few days off it has become clear to me that I need some comfortable casual shoes.......like the 2 dollar old navy flip flops just aren't cutting it anymore.......sadly because you know I am a quantity over quality girl.......this investing in my feet is for the birds........but I did it.........I am now the proud owner of 2 not 1 but 2 pairs of Birkenstock's.......ahhhh ugggg hahahah I can't even believe it....you know what I used to call these things that I am now sporting...."Jesus Shoes" I kid you not, my Aunt and Uncle have always worn these and I would always make fun of them.........see I have said this before whatever I say with passion usually ends up biting me in the ass eventually...

So the next issue of the day was the fact that we have a Summer BBQ to go to this weekend.....now I stress out about this BBQ every year.......and it isn't because I don't like the people there....actually I like them very much it is always a really fun time.........so what is it you are asking.........well they have a POOL.............ugggg and everyone goes swimming???? Like what the heck why....come on people did you miss the memo.... the pool is just for atmosphere not for actually getting wet or cooling off...no it soul purpose is to look pretty man when will they get that........and then of course as soon as 1 person gets in everyone gets in...being the person on the edge with the tip of her toes in the water is never fun really especially as soon as everyone starts saying "are you coming in?...why don't you jump in?.....aren't you hot?...do you want to borrow my suit?..oh it is soooooo nice in here come in!!.......STOP NO if I wanted to get wet and put on a bather I would you idiots...stop asking me..lol....ughhhhh.....
Well I am tired of being so stressed out about this.....I am tired of being self conscious about myself too, but I doubt that that is going to go away anytime soon......yes I do realize that unless I decide to go to the party in a Scuba Suit I will never feel totally comfortable but I figured their had to be something to make it a bit better......so after about 2 hours in our bedroom today having multiple meltdowns, over the fact that I hated every single piece of lycra I own...I went out and bought a pretty nice black tankini.....not bad...nothing is going to help these legs but this isn't half bad!!!

WOW mature or what......I guess this is where it all starts.......you buy a tankini...then you buy a couple pairs of Birkenstock's..........whats next......who knows.....I hope this is it for a bit though....lol

m:)