So here we are again.........you know when you or someone else is driving and all of a sudden you have to slam on the brakes...whether something came out in front of you unexpectedly or the car in front of you stopped, or you thought you could make that light but then realized you better not....and then you have to use all your might to push that brake pedal down and you stop with a jolt.....all of a sudden your heart starts pumping a bit faster and knees might even be knocking a bit...and you just have to sit and regroup and figure out what the heck just happened!
That is how this feels........I feel like someone just slammed the brakes.... on our life.......like a person just stepped out in front of me that I didn't see coming.... and he is holding a sign saying "sorry Miss you actually have to turn around....I'm sorry I startled you but you are not allowed to use this road anymore you must do a u-turn and head back to where you just came from."
I know this is a very "simple" explanation but this is truly how I am feeling right now.....my head knew that I shouldn't count on anything until it happened...I didn't buy anything, I didn't let myself envision a life with a child in it to much, but it was really hard not to....so now we must refocus......regroup....smile and carry on.
My life is a very public one in the town where I work....as one of my good friends said last night "M" you are like the Angelina Jolie of Exeter....hahahah now that is a huge stretch she wasn't meaning her looks (I wish) it was the fact that everyone and I mean everyone seems to be very interested in my life.........ughghghg people I don't even know are calling other people I do know asking about what has happened....Oh boy.....now I have dealt with things like this in the past.....and the great thing about it is the support I get....seriously it is unreal.....people are so kind and caring....on the flip side, it makes this whole situation DRAG on....I am only on day 3 of talking about this at work...and remember in the salon we are on a 6 week rotation......my oh my I have a few more days of rehashing.....so this I am finding a bit exhausting....but what I keep reminding myself is it is only because people are trying to support me, and truthfully people can't help themselves, they love a good juicy story...... they are all a bit nosey....lol lol....life of a small town girl!
I can't help but feel like I have just stepped off the set of a soap opera....when I am explaining our story to people I think... oh my.... I can't believe how that just sounded.....my life is fairly boring, uneventful.....but this sure did spice things up for a bit.....geesh.....so now, what to do....I guess it is back to hairspray and makeup and picking out cupboards and hardwood floors for our new home.....and yes you are so right..... as I know what you are all thinking, I am very lucky and have not one thing to complain about.....my life is good!